I stepped on the school bus today and I was transported back in time to being a teenager and remembered everything I hated about being at school ( fortunately I lived locally and did not have to travel by bus ), but some things, though now have mellowed, have not changed at all since my school days.
On the rare occasions I share the bus with a bunch of children, always many shopping bags arranged around the fold down seat, ( done deliberately so no one sits next to me, and I always wonder how I am going to actually get off the bus one handed, but I always manage. ) On such journeys, I wander into reverie, watch the fields, observe what is occupying them, look at the hedgerows, just about anything but the noise on the bus; yet, they don't bother me and I don't bother them, I remember being that age. However, certain little things have never changed. I am an observer of patterns, patterns that have never changed. I try to shut off but you hear the "loudmouths", the same language that always existed, "you sit there", or, " you are not one of the cool kids", it now seems cooler to be on the bottom half of the bus than the top, in my day it was the opposite.
I was a nanny for years and I understand children's and teenager's behaviour but it isn't always very nice, and probably very diluted in the case of other circumstances, yet it still exists and you can see the people who are controlling and the ones who obey a mile off. This is early on, probably most is banter, but there is a rather subtle element there.
This may seem unrelated to my previous comment, and to some extent it is entirely, and to some extent it is not at all. but you can see subtle behaviour which in some cases grows into something more bitter. Anything fore mentioned is not my point here, but there are elements in people's personalities which make you think, and I think we should all think and open our eyes, because we don't.
People on the internet can be extremely vicious, beyond measure, and it is becoming a free world for many. Bullying takes many forms and it often begins where you least expect it. For me it was school.
In all fairness, my local school bus has nice kids, and I always sit opposite a nice young man who is very polite and helped me with my seat. There is nobody who is not nice, but I'm not going to retract that certain people are bossier than others and it doesn't always feel right.
I grew used to being controversial and not always liked ages ago, so I am not being directly critical of anyone, I just can't stand bullies.
Everything starts on a small level. Never let them do it to you.
Cyberstalked – (Unedited)
A Jewish term “eating your guts,” is what I have been feeling the last week. I refuse to call myself a victim for I am anything but helpless. The words annoyed, angry, and confused better describe my emotions. Dealing with an on-line cyberstalker insulted my reasoning until I realized I was attempting to find logic from the illogical, and possibly mentally ill individual who became obsessed with me after a single conflict in Writers’ Group.
When one assumes they are dealing with a Troll, the best advice is to ignore them. After two weeks, that did not work and escalated the female’s activity. Unlike anyone else who uses Goggle to search my name, she was only able to come up with two posts claiming I made them myself, write no books, sold no books, and could help no one with editing. She posted these blatant lies, and tagged me up to 18 times in a half hour. Her defamation was intentional and it was clear she intended to damage me personally and my business of editing and book sales. Many wondered why I didn’t block her. Blocking gives people free hand to defame you.
Her posts, as many as four and five in a few hours continued to be for the intent of getting me banned from the group for “lying to people” about who I was and what I could do for them. She assured all my potential customers her expert opinion was that I could do nothing to help anyone. When she posted this same diatribe in comments after I offered writing help to someone, I did reply and comment that I had never told anyone “I could take them to bestselling” or “I am a big star.” I asked her to copy and paste any post I made saying either of those things. She was unable to find a single post, but continued to make post and tag me in several posts to others she had written about me.
Facebook gave her a few suspensions, but before the lengthy one, she crossed a line with me, and I contacted an attorney in her city. This may seem over-the-top for a “group troll,” but it went a lot further than trolling to defamation and attacking me on a very personal level. A Google search shows many of her lies about to be lies, and her insisting I know no one outside the group was comical for three reasons. First, many of friends-in-real-life are members of this group. Second, many members have become Facebook friends having access to my wall and photos. My real life is theirs for the reading. Third, she made the same claims to the many who disagreed with her. When she searched my Facebook posts and found one open to friends and friends of friends, sent a friend request to one of my friends, then she attacked on that post on my wall and used a ridiculous ID she created with her name scrambled as her “friend” to tag team me. This is the only post I ever made asking for people to buy my books, and I would autograph and send them personalized. This is what eats my guts about the level she would stoop. MY HUSBAND WAS DIAGNOSED WITH LUNG CANCER, and I offered signed books to raise funds for medication and doctor co-pays – and that sub-human not only responded to my comment on my personal wall, but when her 60 day suspension was over, came to Writers’ Group and falsely accused me of making up my husband’s illness to sell books. How low can a cyberstalker go?
The attorney took a look at the screen-shots, the tags in activity log, and advised me that what she was doing was illegal and my first course of action was to file a police complaint. I don’t care what anyone thinks about me doing just that – I did. Thus, when the sub-human got off suspension, she came right back to the group and demanded that I tell her why. No, the Detective did not find her cyberstalking funny or a waste of time: cyberstalking is a felony and includes social media. The “no-action-yet” is the result of me being unable to make the six hour trip to her town because my husband was very ill while going through cancer treatment, and now has stage four. I really have more important things to deal with then this monster who has done all she could to make my life miserable for months. The line she crossed eats my guts, and I needed to put it on paper. I’m a writer and this is how I release emotions.
When one assumes they are dealing with a Troll, the best advice is to ignore them. After two weeks, that did not work and escalated the female’s activity. Unlike anyone else who uses Goggle to search my name, she was only able to come up with two posts claiming I made them myself, write no books, sold no books, and could help no one with editing. She posted these blatant lies, and tagged me up to 18 times in a half hour. Her defamation was intentional and it was clear she intended to damage me personally and my business of editing and book sales. Many wondered why I didn’t block her. Blocking gives people free hand to defame you.
Her posts, as many as four and five in a few hours continued to be for the intent of getting me banned from the group for “lying to people” about who I was and what I could do for them. She assured all my potential customers her expert opinion was that I could do nothing to help anyone. When she posted this same diatribe in comments after I offered writing help to someone, I did reply and comment that I had never told anyone “I could take them to bestselling” or “I am a big star.” I asked her to copy and paste any post I made saying either of those things. She was unable to find a single post, but continued to make post and tag me in several posts to others she had written about me.
Facebook gave her a few suspensions, but before the lengthy one, she crossed a line with me, and I contacted an attorney in her city. This may seem over-the-top for a “group troll,” but it went a lot further than trolling to defamation and attacking me on a very personal level. A Google search shows many of her lies about to be lies, and her insisting I know no one outside the group was comical for three reasons. First, many of friends-in-real-life are members of this group. Second, many members have become Facebook friends having access to my wall and photos. My real life is theirs for the reading. Third, she made the same claims to the many who disagreed with her. When she searched my Facebook posts and found one open to friends and friends of friends, sent a friend request to one of my friends, then she attacked on that post on my wall and used a ridiculous ID she created with her name scrambled as her “friend” to tag team me. This is the only post I ever made asking for people to buy my books, and I would autograph and send them personalized. This is what eats my guts about the level she would stoop. MY HUSBAND WAS DIAGNOSED WITH LUNG CANCER, and I offered signed books to raise funds for medication and doctor co-pays – and that sub-human not only responded to my comment on my personal wall, but when her 60 day suspension was over, came to Writers’ Group and falsely accused me of making up my husband’s illness to sell books. How low can a cyberstalker go?
The attorney took a look at the screen-shots, the tags in activity log, and advised me that what she was doing was illegal and my first course of action was to file a police complaint. I don’t care what anyone thinks about me doing just that – I did. Thus, when the sub-human got off suspension, she came right back to the group and demanded that I tell her why. No, the Detective did not find her cyberstalking funny or a waste of time: cyberstalking is a felony and includes social media. The “no-action-yet” is the result of me being unable to make the six hour trip to her town because my husband was very ill while going through cancer treatment, and now has stage four. I really have more important things to deal with then this monster who has done all she could to make my life miserable for months. The line she crossed eats my guts, and I needed to put it on paper. I’m a writer and this is how I release emotions.
15 BMTC survival Tips & Hacks for a Bengalurean
1. As the bus approaches, observe the speed at which it's approaching, do some calculations and position yourself so that the door opens right in front of you.
2. If there's no one de-boarding, climb up ASAP, look around for empty seats. If you don't find one, continue reading this answer.
3.You now need to super vigilant. Finding a place to sit is the goal of your life. Start looking around. Observe people. If anybody is removing their headphones, keeping books inside, packing bags they'll probably get down at the next stop. Put on your *Sparta Mode* on, struggle your way through and avoid getting brushed past someone's ass. (Most yucky feeling ever -.- ). Give them a big smile indicating that you want that seat, they'll make sure you get it.
4. Or, you can simply ask people where they get down. There's no shame in this at all. It's not like you're gonna meet them again.
5. If you don't find a seat, try and get into one of the bus pockets. There won't be any stampede, or rubbing against sweaty uncles (Eww), and less chances of getting pick-pocketed. And AIR, fresh air!
6. Avoid uncomfortable situations: Don't support the conductor's ass if he's using your seat as something he can lean on. If you're sitting and a person standing next to you is falling over, ask him/her to get away.
7. How to make your BMTC ride productive!
- If you don't get motion sickness, read a book.
- Listen to podcasts.
- If you're bored, talk to a stranger. Everybody is intriguing in some or the other way. And most of the time, people willing to let out their deepest secrets to strangers. (Has happened with me a lot of times). Always strike a conversation with the one sitting next to you. Your playlist can wait.
- Entertain a child. Or get entertained. Kids are so awesome. :D
- Observe the city. There's so much to learn.
8. Beware of thieves. Phone thieves thrive on BMTC. If you don't want to listen to music, pretend like you are listening. Just plug in the earphones. Big ass saver trick.
9. Do not keep valuables in the front zip of your bag.
10. For women: Never ever ever ever stand near the back door or stand anywhere near the "For old citizens" seat. You'll get groped if the bus is too crowded. And there are creepy men who on purpose position their groin near your face, shoulders. Ask him to GTFO. In case you do get groped, create a big scene. Make sure that jerk is humiliated for the rest of his life.
11. Always give up your seat for the elderly, sick or pregnant ladies. You'll feel good about yourself. :)
12. Pass on your bag to someone sitting. People love to be trusted with others' belongings.
13. Don't argue with stupid aunties. They're not worth it. Plus, it'll ruin your mood for the rest of the day.
14. Oh, oh, and don't forget to buy ticket. BMTC police are super strict.
15. Get a monthly, quarterly, yearly pass if you're a regular commuter.
Source: quora
Body shaming
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| Amanda Bingson |
Great effort by @espn to bring out the body issue this 2015. Absolutely loved it and more power to them! ATHLETES COME IN ALL SHAPES AND SIZES job well done
7 Engineering Lessons to learn from Game of Thrones
1. It doesn't matter whether you are from reputed university or not if you have the skill & determination you will fulfil your dream. Your background won't be a hindrance to your goal. - Jon Snow
2. You topped first two semesters in your B.Tech doesn't mean you will be a topper for the rest of your life. - Robb Stark
3. Girls are not meant only for CS/IT. They can be in one of the most gruelling stream too like fire fighting Engineering. - Arya Stark
4. On a lighter note- Only honesty will not serve you any good in exam. ;) - Ned Stark
5. If you are from MIT or Oxford people will treat you as superior to others. Even if you don't have much quality/skill like others. - Daenerys Targaryen (Come on! She has dragons. What else do you need ?)
6. A student drinks a lot, smokes a lot, get along with other genders a lot doesn't mean he/she is a bad student. - Tyrion Lannister
7. And the last but not the least. We all(not only engineers) have to play our part in this world. Rest is in "his" hand. - George R.R. Martin :p
Gender Equality: Must Read
What are some common forms of sexism that men face?
I have a female friend, aged 26.
She is being forced by her parents to meet some guys and get married.
We had this conversation at a coffee table:
She : Oh! my parents. They want me to get married.
Me : Ya..this happens in India with every girl who turns 25
She : Why girls? You are of my age. Are your parents forcing you for marriage?
Me : No. Not yet. I think they will do in a couple of years
She: Exactly. I too want to get married after a couple of years. I have some career plans, want to travel like you and do lot of things before I get married.
Me : That’s nice. Try convincing your parents once.
She : I can't understand my parents! They are so orthodox. I mean..we all talk about gender equality..and this is how our previous generation thinks! Kuch nahi ho sakta is desh ka (Nothing good can happen in this country). You boys have all the privilege. I hate this system.
Me : Hmm..anyway did you like the last guy you met?
She : No.
Me : Why?
She : (Chuckles) Utna to main kamaati hoon. (I earn almost equal). The guy I will marry should earn more than me and should be more intelligent. In the end, these are basic requirements.
Me : Oh...I thought we were talking about equality!
End of conversation. :P :P
I have a female friend, aged 26.
She is being forced by her parents to meet some guys and get married.
We had this conversation at a coffee table:
She : Oh! my parents. They want me to get married.
Me : Ya..this happens in India with every girl who turns 25
She : Why girls? You are of my age. Are your parents forcing you for marriage?
Me : No. Not yet. I think they will do in a couple of years
She: Exactly. I too want to get married after a couple of years. I have some career plans, want to travel like you and do lot of things before I get married.
Me : That’s nice. Try convincing your parents once.
She : I can't understand my parents! They are so orthodox. I mean..we all talk about gender equality..and this is how our previous generation thinks! Kuch nahi ho sakta is desh ka (Nothing good can happen in this country). You boys have all the privilege. I hate this system.
Me : Hmm..anyway did you like the last guy you met?
She : No.
Me : Why?
She : (Chuckles) Utna to main kamaati hoon. (I earn almost equal). The guy I will marry should earn more than me and should be more intelligent. In the end, these are basic requirements.
Me : Oh...I thought we were talking about equality!
End of conversation. :P :P
9 Reasons why Manohar Parrikar is a great leader in Modi's cabinet
1. He is the first Chief Minister of an Indian state to be an IITian. He has his list of academic achievements and a clean image as a leader.
2. Goa is the only state where petrol costs less than diesel. Under his administration, the VAT was slashed down to 0.1% as a part of the party’s poll manifesto, which reduced the petrol price by a whopping Rs.15 per litre.
3. Every girl child on the completion of 18 years, gets Rs.1 Lac deposited automatically into her bank account.
4. In his home state in Goa, he has converted his official CM’s house as an office while living in his home house.
5. He was instrumental in initiating various social upliftment schemes like Dayanand Samajik Suraksha Yojana, which provides financial assistance to senior citizens, the Cyberage Scheme which provides computers to students thus ushering in a tech-ready student community, CM Rojgar Yojana, etc.
6. He prefers to travel via regular airlines instead of chartered flights and uses Economy class because he does not believe in spending public money in travel and security.
7. As a measure to combat Price Rise, an amount of Rs.1000/- is directly credited in the bank account of housewives.
8. He is credited with single-handedly bringing the IFFI (International Film Festival of India) to Goa, and creating more international quality infrastructure in Goa for the event in a short time than any other former government.
9. Last but not the least, he has been awarded the CNN-IBN Indian of the Year Award in the politics category in 2012.
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